Contract of Wifely Expectations
Talk about issues with women...
Again, the sick-humored part of me says "if he'd just started collecting board games"...
There are so many great bits in it I'm just as flabbergasted as the Smoking Gun editors.
For instance, the dress-up requirements for church. Or the meticulous (and extremely disturbingly clinical) attention to shaving.
But what actually throws me for a loop the most is the typeface. Yes, the typeface. This guy actually sat down at his computer with these ridiculous evil things in his head, and he actually took the extra time to select a somewhat effeminate font to spout all this, like some demented barbecue invitation. And then, on the second page, there are the pornographic initial caps, added like an afterthought on this page and not the first, probably because he thought it'd be sexier that way.
I could also be a little waggish and say that all he was looking for was an appropriate sub -- that he was just running in the wrong social circles -- but what safety word works on a guy who's slipped entirely into the Porno World of his own head?
Oh, and that photograph of him in court? Hel-LO, beautiful man!
(I've got to start being wary of "Husbandly Expectations" notes being left around the house. There's a hell of a lot of shaving I need to start doing.)