day 1 of being his advocate
It starts now:
Dear Dr. XXXXX,
Although I only heard about these events of February 1 secondhand, I know enough now to know that the behavior of Dr. YYYYY was completely unacceptable. I also understand that she stands by her diagnosis; however, after what’s transpired over the past few days, this diagnosis is irrelevant. It is irrelevant with respect to our son’s current developmental state, as we already know about the extent of his delays; it is irrelevant with respect to our son’s future development, as Dr. YYYYY and every other specialist knows that such a diagnosis cannot be made until the child is at least two; and it is irrelevant even with respect to our son’s medical record, as Dr. YYYYY’s examination was at best incomplete.
This might seem to you like the anger of parents who are going through the so-called stages of grief, which must naturally end in acceptance of mental retardation (such a loaded term) of a child in whom they have invested countless hopes, dreams and aspirations. It isn’t. This is the anger of parents who have been misused and cruelly treated by a system to which they have turned for support.
Perhaps the most galling thing for me is that we’ve had our hope and faith shattered by this, where previously we were extremely confident about our son’s future. Doubt has been introduced into our lives, where previously there was none. I want you to understand that even if Dr. YYYYY’s assessment turns out to be completely accurate in all respects, our treatment at the Washington Clinic is what remains and stays with us.
Like my wife, my greatest hope is that incidents like this don’t get repeated for any other family coming to your hospital for help. All the state-of-the-art pediatric facilities in the world don’t make a bit of difference if the staff is unused to dealing with parents and children in a remotely considerate and compassionate manner. I don’t know if your facility, like many, offers courses for specialists in how to approach patients -- and parents of patients -- with more sympathy, understanding, and cognizance of the scientific method. If it does, perhaps these standards should be applied more rigorously in the future.
Sincerely,
B
M has her own letter which goes into the factual details and sheer incompetence of what happened, which she'll post as well I think. We'll see what happens...