deeply disturbing
Bill O'Reilly, he of the furiously spinning "No Spin Zone", has a children's book out. The O'Reilly Factor -- For Kids!
Truth be told, after thumbing through it a little, it was less obnoxious than I thought. Nothing about the evils of progressive taxation or fantasizing about the death of Al Franken. However, as you might expect from a guy like O'Reilly, most of the book (even when it's supposed to be about the children) is about himself: every other page is crowded with his experiences growing up as a little hectoring O'Reilly, even up to the time he became a shouting (and highly-paid) media analyst. Living off the fat of the chattering classes is apparently very hard work. (He gets up at 7 every day to look at the news and figure out how he's going to talk about it.) The book is also REALLY creepy -- just look at Amazon's own quoted review:
Does the name Bill O'Reilly conjure up an advice maven for kids? Didn't think so. Yet here we have a book in which the Fox talk-show host goes into Dutch-uncle mode, offering his opinions about everything from families and friends to the Internet and sex (he lost his virginity at 20). Although written with Flowers, a former high-school teacher and coauthor of many books, this sounds like vintage O'Reilly: pithy and direct but also patronizing ("I like many things about you kids"). Each chapter begins with quotes from kids who have written into his show (!), followed by a short introduction and a personal O'Reilly story. In the alcohol chapter, for instance, he recalls watching a group of his friends get disgustingly drunk, which prompted him to vow never to drink. He ends with some general comments; for example, weatherman Willard Scott (lots of kid appeal there!) lapsed into alcoholism after his wife's death. Still, there's nothing wrong with most of the commonsensical advice O'Reilly dispenses; it's the sort found everywhere--do well in school, don't take drugs, avoid the wrong friends. But barf alert for the occasional instant-message inserts in which O'Reilly uses common IM terms to explore how two typical teenagers, one a "pinhead" and the other a "smart operator," would react to various situations. Bill O'Reilly talking kids' language: SMHID (scratch my head in disbelief).
Yes, the glossary at the end of IM terms makes the whole thing come off like he's your creepy uncle with the crazy eyes. The one who wants to sit down and "rap" with the kids while he stinks of pee. You have to wonder -- especially at the fact that he's supposed to be a former schoolteacher himself.