the requested La Fondue story
1. Go to aforementioned restaurant with friends.
2. Get ushered into restaurant with decor strongly reminiscent of Medieval Times but without the odor of manure, or maybe a place where a whispered "Fidelio" is required to get to the good stuff. Minus all the orgies.
3. Have brief pang of guilt at breaking diet so flagrantly even though you'd explicitly planned to break it tonight anyway.
4. Cheesy goodness.
5. Continue shoving food down your gullet while you have a growing sense of unease.
6. Chocolate/Frangelico ecstasy. The pot commands you to follow its wishes and dip anything you can find into it, the better to bathe in the dark sugary wonderland. Continue overeating to the point of distended, gargantuan, criminal obesity.
7. Start farting uncontrollably in the car. Do not let up until you reach San Carlos.
8. Trade massive farts with spouse. Stew in own juices well past bedtime. Reminisce on the exciting life you lead. Cling to knowledge that no one need ever know of any of this.
9. Spend all day today achy and tired. Hone bitterness at having spent that much money eating cheese and chocolate.
10. Blame restaurant for everything rather than own lack of self-control.
11. Write whole humiliating saga as requested.
